Mama - by Nikkya Hargrove

About the Book

Book Synopsis

In this searing and uplifting memoir, a young Black queer woman fresh out of college adopts her baby brother after their incarcerated mother dies, determined to create the kind of family she never had.

Nikkya Hargrove spent a good portion of her childhood in prison visiting rooms. When her mother--addicted to cocaine and just out of prison--had a son and then died only a few months later, Nikkya was faced with an impossible choice. Although she had just graduated from college, she decided to fight for custody of her half brother, Jonathan. And fight she did.

Nikkya vividly recounts how she is subjected to preconceived notions that she, a Black queer young woman, cannot be given such responsibility. Her honest portrayal of the shame she feels accepting food stamps, her family's reaction to her coming out, and the joy she experiences when she meets the woman who will become her wife reveal her sheer determination. And whether she's clashing with Jonathan's biological father or battling for Jonathan's education rights after he's diagnosed with ADHD and autism, this is a woman who won't give up.

Nikkya's moving story picks up where Bryan Stevenson's Just Mercy left off, exploring generational trauma and pulling back the curtain on family court and poverty in America. Mama is an ode to motherhood and identity, and to finding strength in family and community, for readers of memoirs by Ashley C. Ford, Natasha Tretheway, and Dawn Turner.

Review Quotes

2025 Memoir Magazine Memoir Prize Winner in the LGBTQ+, Family, Resilience Category

"The book is deeply moving and shows how one woman managed to differentiate herself from her mom, find queer love, and discover her voice. I loved it."--Katie Couric Media, "14 Best New Books Out This Fall, According to a Bookfluencer"

"Readers Will be Inspired."--Publishers Weekly

"Candid... an accessible, encouraging model of how to construct a family with hope and intention. Quietly revelatory and affirming."--Kirkus Reviews

"Bracing, intimate, and immensely personal, Mama is also a quintessential story of our American generation: the story of growing up in the throes of Mass Incarceration. Now, as a mother and author, Nikkya shares that story with the same courage with which she faced so many challenges before. Anyone interested in forging a better American future should read this book."
--Max Kenner, founder and executive director, Bard Prison Initiative

"A powerful and moving testament to love and redemption."
--Phuc Tran, author of Sigh, Gone: A Misfit's Memoir of Great Books, Punk Rock, and the Fight to Fit In

"Mama is an evocative, unflinching, and ultimately triumphant tale of the burdens and bounty of familial love. Both brilliant and brave, Hargrove opens her heart on every page of this notable debut, and the result is transcendent."--Mat Johnson, author of Invisible Things and Pym

"Mama is unforgettable: a compassionate, wise, observant, full-hearted, and beautifully crafted memoir of queer love and family that is destined to be beloved by many readers and will leave you cheering. Hargrove offers a deep and stirring view of the impacts of addiction and the criminal justice system on Black women, offering an account of hope, heartbreak, faith, courage, joy, and the comfort and care of extended and chosen families."
--Sonya Huber, author of Voice First: A Writer's Manifesto and Pain Woman Takes Your Keys

About the Author

Nikkya Hargrove is a graduate of Bard College and currently serves as a member of the school's Board of Governors and chair of the alumni/ae Diversity Committee. A LAMBDA Literary Nonfiction Fellow, she has written about adoption, marriage, motherhood, and the prison system for The Washington Post, The Guardian, The New York Times, Scary Mommy, and Shondaland. She has worked for social impact nonprofits providing support to underserved communities throughout her professional career. She lives in Connecticut with her wife and three children.