The Mindful Marriage - by Ron L Deal & Nan Deal & Terry Hargrave & Sharon Hargrave (Hardcover)

About the Book

"Why does my spouse trigger my emotions so much, and how can we stop the cycle of hurt that causes so many problems? Ron and Nan Deal have been there. Involved in Christian marriage and family ministry for over two decades, they taught and counseled couples about having a healthy marriage, yet privately their marriage was struggling. When they suffered the devastating loss of one of their children, their marriage was nearly shattered by their destructive cycles. At wits' end, they sought the help of pioneering therapists Dr. Terry Hargrave and Sharon Hargrave, LMFT, whose transformational Restoration Therapy has helped millions through the practice of emotional mindfulness. The Deals identified the patterns of coping that threatened their attachment, both individually and as a couple, and became less reactive, allowing them to move with intention from a Pain Cycle to a Peace Cycle. As they embraced this Scripture-based model, they became more skilled at responding with humility to each other, forever changing and strengthening their marriage. Now the Deals and Hargraves introduce readers to this proven method-part science, part art-that challenges popular beliefs about how relationships work. In their winsome and vulnerable way, they show readers how to better understand themselves, especially in times of emotional distress, so that they can self-regulate. Christian readers will especially appreciate the balance of scientifically proven methods along with Scripturally sound teaching, resulting in more loving, faithful marital relationships"--

Book Synopsis

Backed by neuroscience and biblical principles, this book delivers a trauma-informed therapeutic model for healthy couples who want a stronger connection and offers deep transformation for couples in troubled relationships so they can stop painful patterns.

When Ron and Nan Deal suffered the devastating loss of their child, their marriage was nearly shattered by their destructive cycles. At wits' end, they sought the help of pioneering therapists Dr. Terry Hargrave and Sharon Hargrave, LMFT, whose transformational Restoration Therapy has helped millions through the practice of emotional mindfulness.

Now, the Deals and Hargraves introduce readers to this proven method that challenges popular beliefs about how relationships work. They show readers how to better understand themselves in times of emotional distress, so that they can self-regulate. Christian readers will especially appreciate the balance of scientifically proven methods along with Scripturally sound teaching, resulting in more loving, faithful marital relationships.

Review Quotes

"The Mindful Marriage is a deep calling, not only in marriage, but across every relationship. It is an honest, transparent, and compelling journey on how God sees beauty in brokenness. A must read."--Eric Scalise, Ph.D., President of Hope for the Heart

"I love this book! Therapists and ministers should have this book on their shelf and get it into the hands of every marriage person they know."--Chris Gonzales, Ph.D., Professor of Marriage & Family Therapy, Lipscomb University

"The Mindful Marriage contains insights and practical tools to help you transform intimacy in your relationship. It blends a powerful combination of research-based techniques, biblical truth, and real-life application."--Dr. Juli Slattery, Author of God, Sex, and Your Marriage

"The Mindful Marriage will be a gamechanger for couples! The Mindful Marriage walks you through an experience that helps you show up as the best version of you in your marriage and in life."--Julie M. Baumgardner, Senior Director of WinShape Marriage

"The Mindful Marriage is groundbreaking in how it synthesizes what we know about interpersonal neurobiology, attachment research, and self-control to transform partners by the renewing of their minds. Practical and transformative, I highly recommend this book."--Steve Arterburn, bestselling author and founder of New Life LIVE

"In this insightful book, the Deals and Hargraves show us how to set aside our prideful tendencies and focus on loving our spouse the way God intends. I'm confident that successfully applying these principles will transform your relationship."--Greg Smalley, Ph.D., Vice President of Marriage and Family Formation at Focus on the Family

"Ron and Nan Deal's deep understanding of neuroscience and how our brains can truly be rewired for love and peace, as well as their foundation of a biblical lens, is a great contribution to this arena. These principles can revolutionize marriages that seem hopeless, as well as make a good marriage even better. Highly recommended!"--John Townsend, Ph.D., Author of 35 books including the New York Times bestselling Boundaries series

"This book will help you understand yourself and point the way to having healthier responses. Every married couple will profit from the message of this book."--Gary Chapman, Ph.D., Author of The 5 Love Languages

"What a unique, engaging, self-revealing presentation! Readers will be able to relate personally to the concepts as they are gently guided through this mindfully healing process."--Dr. Cliff and Joyce Penner, Authors of The Gift of Sex

"Whether your relationship is wounded or winning, The Mindful Marriage reveals a healing path to your 'Us.' It's powerful. Practical. And breathtakingly honest. Ron and Nan beautifully share their own intimate journey toward restoration and resilience. This book is a treasure trove of wisdom for anyone looking to deepen their relationship through mindful intentions."--Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott, New York Times bestselling authors of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts

About the Author

Terry Hargrave, PhD, and Sharon Hargrave, LMFT, are the founders of Restoration Therapy. Terry served as the Evelyn and Frank Freed Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy at Fuller Theological Seminary and has been training therapists for over 35 years. Sharon served as the Executive Director of the Boone Center for the Family at Pepperdine University, is the Founder of RelateStrong, and maintains a private practice. In their work together as authors, educators, conference speakers, retreat leaders, and trainers, they are passionate about helping people restore love and trust in marriages and families and building close, intimate and connected relationships. They reside in Arizona and have two adult married children and a growing number of grandchildren.

Ron Deal, MMFT, and Nan Deal, BSE, are popular conference speakers who lead marriage seminars based on Restoration Therapy and a small group for parents who have lost a child. Frequently featured in national media, Ron is the bestselling author of more than a dozen books and resources, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and host of the FamilyLife Blended(R) podcast. Nan retired from teaching after 25 years and currently works for Live Thankfully. They have three sons, a daughter-in-law, one grandson, and a Golden Retriever and reside in Little Rock, Arkansas. Learn more at RonDeal.org.